The Post Where I Go Back to the Future...Or Dear Andrea

I'm Back! Back posting with my fellow homeschoolers at The Canadian Homeschooler I thought I'd write my younger self a letter. This is my 13th year homeschooling, but I think I'd like to tell my younger, idealistic self a few things about what to expect. Maybe I should be writing this when I'm done in six years and my youngest has graduated. Truly, I still have so much left to learn and my children are teaching me still so much about myself.

Dear Andrea,

Well congratulations! You are taking a big leap of faith with your young family. Homeschooling! You are in for the ride of your life! Correction! Your family is in for the ride of their life! No... you aren't crazy or a glutton for punishment as so many people will tell you when you tell them you home school. You're brave and be proud of your decision. Period. It is what you and your husband have decided that will fit your family needs, not anyone else's family. Here's a few more points to take to heart.

Enjoy your kids for who they really are. Breathe in each moment...the good, the bad and the ugly, because time flies way too fast. Graduation seems like a lifetime away when your kids are just getting into the Magic Treehouse series; but you'll blink and your oldest will be a first year university student in no time. It's a blessing to have your children at home and to be able to homeschool them. Please remember that, when you're pulling your hair out with your oldest as you try to teach him basic math facts, your four year old needs you in the washroom, your two year old is screaming because she wants Craisins, and the baby finds the craft scissors and decides to restyle her hair!

Oh...and you will have days when you'll be wanting to flag down that big yellow school bus. Homeschooling will not be sunshine and lollipops all the time. There's no idealistic picture of the perfect homeschool life. There will be days dinner won' be ready, the laundry won't be started or the house will look like a hurricane hit it. So please don't beat yourself up over that, and don't let anyone else bring you to shame because it's not the way "they"do or did things. In time you'll learn to manage and embrace the beauty of the chaos and the calm. Some days you will even hide in the bathroom sobbing that you're actually doing your children a dis-service. The junior high years will NOT be a picnic all the time! Opinions will clash and voices will be raised. But the love and respect will remain between you and your children. There will be days you will want to crawl back into bed and forget the whole thing. Nevertheless, even as each of your children will test the boundaries of your sanity, you really won't want to have it any other way. You get to witness the firsts. You get to see those "aha" moments. (Just make sure hubby has a nice glass of red waiting for you after you dry your tears) and pray for LOTS of grace!

Another thing...you are not...I repeat...you are NOT like any other family. PLEASE don't compare. You will think that the grass is greener on the other side because of what others do, or the curriculum they use, or even what kind of approach they follow, but don't fall into that comparison trap! Form your own entity. Be accountable for yourself and your children...no one else.  You and your children are unique individuals. Roll with the tide, always seek positive inspiration, but do what's right for your family. Don't BE like anyone else.

Don't freak out a week before your facilitator visit. You've got this. Really! She is there to cheer you on, and she knows how much you are doing to shape and form the minds and hearts of your children. So what if you haven't dotted all your I's and crossed all your T's for Alberta Ed. Just breathe and remember the big picture. That's what matters the most...not the paper work.

And finally, never look back at the could haves or the should haves. Allow room for all the mistakes. While you're watching your children grow into amazing human beings, you're growing too. Mistakes will make you all stronger and wiser. It will be easy to get down on yourself, but try not to do that. This journey is with the people that love you; and you love the most. So have fun and push through the trying times... because see this?

This...right here...is when you`ll cry tears of joy and relief. This...right here is when you`ll realize it will all be worth it!