Remembering...

Honestly? I don't know who will read this, and remember where they were ten years ago.
I saw this http://calgary.ctvnews.ca/strathcona-tweedsmuir-remembers-those-lost-in-2003-avalanche-1.1138230  and I caught my breath.

I stopped... not because I recognized the name, and I'm proud of where I went to school, nor did I say "Hey...I was there, with everyone else at the Saddle dome weeping  at the loss of young lives.
I caught my breath  and sat silent in front of the computer, because now...fast forward ten years, and I have a fifteen year old too.

Ten years ago, I had a 2 month old, a 3 1/2 year old, and a 5 year old.  As a mother, I was sad.  Nevertheless, I don't think it had a profound impact on me, because I was still new to the whole parenting thing. I just prayed, that I would never have to face anything so devastating in my life as those parents did. I went home after the memorial service and hugged by babies for a very long time. I carried on, raising my babies.

Now, I'm no means "experienced", as a parent, and I'm at a different stage of mothering now. I'm still learning and stumbling and making mistakes. I'm dealing with teenage angst and pre-teen issues, instead of breastfeeding, diapers, bottles and Thomas the Tank Engine.   Yet today ... looking at the faces of the seven 15/16 year old boys and girls, who lost their lives that fateful day...my emotions are different...and I realize my fears are different. I could never walk a mile...or the last ten years in their parents' shoes.

Time to go hug my babies...for a very long time.